Average Jane

Spec-tacular! Adventures in Glasses

The whole concept of shopping for glasses is bizarre. Let’s follow some logic:

– The idea behind even owning glasses is that you can’t see.
– When you go shopping for glasses the idea is that you try on glasses to see what looks best.
– In order to try on glasses, you must first take off your own glasses.
– With your seeing glasses off and your trial glasses on, you are then supposed to make a logical decision about if something looks good or not.

Is this bizarre to anyone else? Making a major aesthetic decision without being able to see the thing that you’re buying?

I don’t trust anyone. This isn’t a secret. The person I trust least of all is myself. This leads to many everyday issues, including buyers remorse. So when I went (alone) into the glasses place last night on a whim (read: caffeine high), I was taking a risk. I like the ones I picked out, but it’s a big decision. BIG DECISION! Not like buying a cute new sweater or a fancy new boob-inducing bra.

Glasses are the one thing you wear everyday… that can be seen by everybody you meet. (Note: that caveat was inserted for all of you who wear the same underwear everyday. Not my problem.)

They also give you “personality”. I love my current glasses dearly. I am often stopped by random drunk men in random bars and complimented. Usually told that I look like a librarian. I guess that’s supposed to be flattering.

I don’t, by the way, look like a librarian. But fantasies are fantasies, and if they are into old ladies with few teeth, slouched stockings, and pencils behind their ears, that’s rad, but it’s not me. Nor do I even resemble the fake, vamped up, porn star version of a librarian. Nor do I even like librarians! They are usually mean and high on their literary horses.

What is it with men and glasses? They go NUTS over women in glasses. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I think guys in (nice) glasses are mega hot. Maybe it speaks to the glasses wearers taste? But that doesn’t even hold too much water due to the aforementioned inability to pick out glasses blindly. Maybe it speaks to the glasses wearer’s friends’ taste. Good taste in friends who have good taste?

Perhaps it’s the idea that glasses imply intelligence. Intelligence implies power. Therefore glasses are powerful? In reality they say “they have bad vision” which is a genetic weakness.

Can anyone shed light on the subject? Val does this sometimes: In the comment section, tell me if you find glasses attractive, and if you’re feeling fancy, venture a guess as to why that is the case!

Love y’alls!

P.S. I totally got my new laptop today. More exciting laptop related news to follow!


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  1. * Matt says:

    In collge, I got high on speed and went clothing shopping. Tell me about buyer’s remorse.

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  2. * Gavin says:

    I think glasses are very sexy. I think it’s because they frame and accentuate they eyes, and the eyes are the sexiest part of a woman. Glasses are like an invitation.

    It’s a very subjective thing. But I know what I like.

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  3. * Hey Pretty says:

    I really like the ones you currently wear. If I were you, I’d stick to those.

    I have glasses for reading and computer work. They’re oval. The front of the rims are brown tortishell and the backs are blue. They match my hair and eyes and I always get compliments on them.

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  4. * Lisa says:

    Wrong answer, Hey Pretty! Wrong answer! I already bought them!!! =( My superhuman buyers remorse cannot deal with this! *sigh*

    I hope you end up liking them. But really they are just another option. I can buy another pair next year, I think. And since you are the first objector, you are automatically volunteered to go spec shopping with me next time.

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  5. * Hey Pretty says:

    Oh, oops. I mean, I’m sure they look gorgeous on you. What wouldn’t,after all? Plus, everyone knows that after buying a new bra, you practically *have* to invest in new specs. What good are boobs if you can’t admire them yourself?

    How’s that?

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  6. * 123Valerie says:

    Wearing glasses actually boosts my IQ by 10 points. Fact.

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  7. * Joey O. says:

    I totally have a thing for ladies in glasses…I ?think? it dates back to a crush I had on a girl who wore the now-common hipster-stylee black frames when I was in college.

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 1 month ago
  8. It was said that God loves skinny boy with glasses… ok, it wasn’t exactly said, but it was written on one of my (hot) teacher’s t-shirt, and being one msyelf (skinny boy with glasses), I stuck with the idea… Anyway, having been supposedly made to His (Her?) image, I suppose it’s pretty normal for us to like people wearing glasses.
    Or maybe not, but it’s too damn early in the morning for me to argue more deeply about it…

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 11 months ago

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