Average Jane

Dressing to Impress Trader Joe?

The joke went like this:

Hey, Jane – Whatcha doing this Friday?

Oh, not much. Going to Trader Joes.

What, are you guys, like, dating?

Less a joke and more a fantasy, my Friday evening trips to Trader Joe’s made me deliriously happy. I would come home from work, throw on whateverthehelliwanted, toss my hair in a ratty bun, grab my reusable bags (you’re welcome Al!) and iPod and head for my happy place. Full of suburban moms and young, optimistic couples, I could wander the aisles feeling smug. About exactly nothing in particular.

Then I moved to Arlington, the land of pretty people in nice clothes all the time. The land of attractive (douchebag, over-educated, less-successful-than-they-claim-to-be) men in nice suits and their blonde (over-educated, highly successful and probably really nice)  flavor of the month. Even my business casual work-at-a-bank attire looks frumpy around these suited beauties. And it doesn’t seem to change on the weekends. How to they still look so polished at 10am on a Saturday? Their designer-matched yoga clothes, their blown out hair in pony tails, their seemingly tailored t-shirts and running pants. Do they EVER take a day off?

Trader Joe and I go way back. But now my competition has upped the ante and I have to meet them. Perhaps it’s time to unfrump. Can anyone get me on “What Not To Wear…In DC…At The Market”???  How about some fashion bloggers out there take me under their wing. I should make a sign, “Will Blog for Style!”

*Sigh* Philly was good for one thing: Not giving a fuck.


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  1. * terra says:

    In Richmond, people are the same way, but I think it’s because our Trader Joe’s is in the suburbs and it’s native territory for sporty soccer moms.

    | Reply Posted 6 years, 3 months ago

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